Just Eat

1 Corinthians 10:31 “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.”

1 Samuel 1:18 “…Then she went her way and ate something, and her face was no longer downcast.”

1 Kings 19:4-8 “But he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness and came and sat down under a broom tree. And he asked that he might die, saying, “It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life, for I am no better than my fathers.” And he lay down and slept under a broom tree. And behold, an angel touched him and said to him, “Arise and eat.” And he looked, and behold, there was at his head a cake baked on hot stones and a jar of water. And he ate and drank and lay down again. And the angel of the Lord came again a second time and touched him and said, “Arise and eat, for the journey is too great for you.” And he arose and ate and drank, and went in the strength of that food forty days and forty nights to Horeb, the mount of God.”

I was so touched by this verse that I had to text my man about it. I can get quite cranky when I’m hangry and he tends to be the receiver of my crankiness.

So many times in scripture food is referenced! Sacrificing food, gathering around food, gifting food, food falling from Heaven, food, food, food. God knows that we need food. Jesus was on this earth and His ministry was bringing food to people, fishing for food with people, gathering around food with people, sharing important news with people over food, using food as a representation of his body! FOOD!

The Bible also talks about what to eat, not to eat too much, and treating your body as a temple. Not to just be gluttons, but to appreciate food, and take care of our bodies.

Mental health and moods are included in that ‘taking care of’ bit. So enjoy the cake but also eat the foods that are going to nourish us and keep us from being miserable to those we are called to love.

Eat!

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Auto-Pilot.

au·to·mat·ic pi·lot

ˈˌôdəˈmadik ˈpīlət/

noun

noun: automatic pilot; plural noun: automatic pilots

1. a device for keeping an aircraft on a set course without the intervention of the pilot.

I was walking through the grocery store today, in a lot of pain, in a hurry, pretty ticked off, probably with a not so nice look on my face, and I thought how terrible would it be for someone from church to see me like this? When I’m in church mode I’m on auto pilot. I laugh. I engage. I smile. I ask the right questions. I nod at the right times. I don’t say the wrong things. I don’t bring up my stance on politics, drugs, guns, or any other controversial topics. I’m just a generic nodding smiley gal with no opinions.

It’s exhausting though. I love when it’s over. I love when I get into my car and can release. Release the tension I have been putting my body through for the last four and a half hours, just let my mind breathe, let my body breathe. It’s such a relief. I’m not an extrovert. I have never claimed to be one, but when you’re in so many ministries you have very little choice on the matter. You are programmed to be bubbly, outgoing, smiley, polite, pleasant. Dare I say fake. Gasp. Yes, fake.

You don’t want to see the real me. No one wants to see the real me. The real me is in pain 24/7, the real me is a serious introvert. The real me doesn’t like hugs. Or people. Or talking. Or trying to remember a thousand names. The real me is impatient and a very deep thinker. The real me has struggles with God. My relationship with Him is really rocky. It’s on the verge of a cliff almost every second of everyday. But I can’t show that. I can’t show the real me. So I will continue to put myself on auto pilot to get through the day in one piece.  But as soon as it’s over and I am in the comfort of my own car I break into a million pieces. I usually sob on my way home and lock myself in my room under the covers because I am so exhausted I cannot do life anymore that day.

If you do happen to see me one of these days in the grocery store in a cranky state, I suggest you keep on walking, for your own sake.